Saturday, November 29, 2008

One Year Ago Today

Her soul mate said goodbye to this world and hello to Heaven's gates.

Meet Daniel's Grandma, Grandma Wilson.

On this day one year ago Grandpa Wilson, took his final breath.

I can't imagine what it is like to lose someone you share your life with. Someone who has held you tight for so many years, shared your joys and sorrows. Someone who has loved you for better or worse. I don't know what it is like to go from a home filled with conversation to a home of silence. This I can not relate to, but it must be so very hard.

We had the opportunity this summer to go for a visit back home. While there, we stayed with Grandma Wilson. Every night before bed she would talk about Grandpa. She would talk about what they use to do before bed each night, or how they would spend their mornings. She talked about how they kept each other warm at night. She told us about how she still does things his way..."Grandpa thought it best to leave those kitchen lights on... so I still leave them on all night long."

But at the end of each conversation she would say something like: "But you know what? He is in a much better place now" or "Can you believe he is already there?... oh, how I wonder what it must be like." with her sweet smile. Then with that simple, sweet, little girl smile on her face she would say to me, "now you dry up those tears hun, you're going to make us both tear up."

But you know what? Thinking back, I don't think they were those kind of tears. I think the reason I would tear up was because every night she would talk about him and I don't think she ever realized she was doing it. She was just happy to have someone to share in conversation with right before bed. She just loved talking about his life, their life. Isn't that so amazing? Their life. It isn't just your life anymore is it? It is a life together.

I'll never know why I am so blessed to share in a life together with such a wonderful person. I don't know why some people are so sad, some lonely, some left behind; yet others find a life full of happiness. It makes me sad.

I do know this however, if I ever experience a life lived with out my wonderful husband, I pray I will be as strong as Grandma Wilson; living and loving like Jesus and leaning on Him for comfort and friendship. After all, It is He who hears her conversations before bed now.

And yet, her joy fills the room each day.

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